A lot of days of LOVE and no blogging

I’ve been busy. I got a new job. I’ve been house hunting. Sometimes LOVE takes a back seat. That’s always been the problem. Still a struggle.

Things I’ve been thinking about though: In the wake of another mass shooting, and the political opinions that abound after LOVE (is patient and kind) is hard. LOVE (keeps no record of wrongs, always hopes) is hard too. But LOVE never fails.

I’ve been thinking a lot about what LOVE is,  and how much it challenges me to the core. I’ve been struggling with the desire to escape reality and become entrenched in the make believe of TV or stories. I want to bad to not be faced with the need to LOVE in hard times. To LOVE neighbors who are hurting, to LOVE enemies that cause pain, to LOVE people who fail. I fail too often at LOVE.

For now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known. And now these three remain: faith, hope and LOVE. But the greatest of these is LOVE.

– 1 Corinthians 13:12-13

I have no patience for the meantime. I want to see fully, to understand fully. I want to know completely. But that isn’t for me now. For now, what I do have is faith, hope and LOVE. I must LOVE with all that I am, and take every opportunity to learn and grow in LOVE.

These days are hard. They feel so uncertain. Yet, I have hope. And I will cling to it. I will cling to faith, hope and LOVE for they are enduring and they are the promise of the Spirit. They are the promise in the meantime, as the glimpse of something eternal and unshakable.

I have been prayer-less recently. My heart is so hard and stubborn. I have been without the very lifeblood my soul needs– connection to God. And tonight as I was becoming more and more enraged at the state of the world and the responses to tragedy I found myself quoting the LOVE verses. LOVE is patient and kind. LOVE isn’t proud and doesn’t envy and doesn’t boast. It is slow to anger. LOVE keeps no record of wrongs. LOVE delights in the truth…. (that was from memory, which is spotty, so forgive any missing/fumbled pieces). And none of the responses that I had to the situation at hand reflected in any way what LOVE is. So I stopped myself. And I sought out this journey instead. Growing in  LOVE. Seeking LOVE. Maybe that in itself is a sign of progress.

Dear God,

Things seem bad down here. Remind us of your great LOVE and your great grace. For we need that, and we need you, so desperately. Fill me with LOVE that I may respond to anger and hatred wherever I find it with grace and LOVE. That I may reflect you in any setting, in any circumstance, because I would be so filled with your Spirit and who you are. I LOVE you and am grateful that you know me and LOVE me anyway. You are a good Father. 

In the name of Jesus. Amen

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